Ribbon and Kirby's Relationship Messed up!
by Pikfan
Summary: What? Ribbon and Kirby's relationship can't mess up! Unless it's for a stupid reason. Let's find out why. Rated T now. Chapter 4: 3 Part Randomness
1. Why Kirby Took It?

Ribbon & Kirby's Relationship..._Messed Up!!!_

A/N: Wait a minute. What is this all about? At first, Ribbon and Kirby had a wonderful time. Now what's going on? Read and find out, Kirby fans! Oh! And be positivly sure you read my first story before this one.

Disclaimer: I don't own Kirby. And that is that!

Chapter 1: Why Kirby Took It?

* * *

Once apon a time in Cappy Town, we revisit the wedded Ribbon eating a bowl of Resses Puff Cereal. 

Soon, Kirby came into the house.

"Hey, Kirby! How was your day?" Ribbon asked.

"Work was a killer! First, we have to eat only a tiny lunch due to debt, and then, King Doofus Dinghead Dohboy decide to make me work at 7:00 p.m to 7:00 a.m.! Kirby said.

"Wow. That's too bad. At least you're out of work today," Ribbon said.

"Yeah, and now my day's gone better," Kirby said, then kissed Ribbon on the cheek for a period of time.

"HEY! CUT IT OUT!! WE'RE TRYING TO KEEP THIS STORY UNDER T!!!" Mr. Bir...I mean...Tokkori said.

"Sorry for that!" Ribbon yelled back.

Then Ribbon looked at the clock.

"Oh crap, I'm late!!" Ribbon yelled, then rushed to the bathroom.

"Late? Late for what?? I didn't know you had a job," Kirby said.

"I knew I forgot to tell you. Well, you see, the Mayor of this town asked me if I do him a favor," Ribbon asked.

"And what may that be?" Kirby asked.

"It's not what you think! All I have to do is to guard his candycane," Ribbon said

"You said snot," Kirby said and laughed.

"Kirby, can we go back to the subject?" Ribbon asked.

"Oh, right. Why can't he just eat the candycane? And why guard it anyway? DDD said that he's going on a escargot diet, and say eat it in front of Escar-snail. I don't know why, though, but's funny to see Escar-snail scream in terror" Kirby said.

"Well, that isn't an ordinary candycane, of course. It's more like a candycane genie. When someone licks it, it grants wishes! It can tell wishes from there mind. And besides, you know that DDD is a liar. So that's why he lets me protect the candycane," Ribbon said.

"Well, okey-dokey, see ya later...by the way, you don't mind if I invite a friend over, would you?"Kirby asked.

"Sure, why not. Okay, bye!" Ribbon said and flew off.

Hours later, Ribbon saw Kirby with best friend, Gooey.

"Hi Ribbon, this is Gooey. Gooey, this Ribbon!" Kirby introduced.

"Hello, there," Ribbon said.

"Hiya everybody!!! (hiccup!)" Gooey said.

"Pardon me for asking, but are you drunk??"

"Pretty much, yeah. But I'm (hiccup) sober enough to drive. I only had like...um...1 or 2 trillion glasses" Gooey answered.

"Mind if I ask, what were you 2 doing when I was gone?" Ribbon asked.

"Nothing really, we just played a few games is all..." Kirby said.

_Flashback._

"Hey Gooey, I dare you to make out with Tokkori," Kirby said.

"Are you kidding me? I have to be very drunk and insane to do that!!" Gooey yelled.

"Fine, All you have to do now is to look at the sun and drink all of this root beer," Kirby said showing Gooey a ton of beer.

"This root beer smells like Meta Knight. And I doubt that looking at the sun isn't too safe," Gooey explained.

"Of course it's not safe. Did you know that scientists tell lies? The sun is only Pac-Man on weed. And root beer always smell like Meta Knight," Kirby lied.

"Okay then, let's do this," Gooey said, starting to drink all of the beer.

_Later._

"Are you okay?" Kirby asked.

"How would I know that? (Hiccup)" Drunk Gooey asked.

"Let's see...what's 2 plus 2?" Kirby asked.

"Everyone knows that it's 22!!" Gooey said.

"Okay, you're drunk. Now I dare you to make out with Tokkori," Kirby said again.

"Do what now?" Gooey asked.

_Reality._

"Besides, he's always drunk!" Kirby said.

"Excuse me, but I'm not a..." Gooey said, then threw up. "Okay, I'll leave now," he finished and left.

"Since we've got the extra word count out of the way, let me introduce you the candycane genie! I know that the dickie mayor told me not to share it with anyone, but you can have the first lick," Ribbon asked.

"You really trust me to take a lick of the candycane?" Kirby asked. Ribbon nodded.

So Kirby took a lick out of the candycane, and his wish was...a candycane.

"So your wish was a candycane?" Ribbon asked angerly.

"Well I can't eat the wishing one. Wait a minute, will the mayor know that someone licked the candycane?" Kirby asked.

"Well, you see, once a wisher made wishes, a day later, it comes back to normal. No worries. But do you have to go to work in a hour?" Ribbon asked.

"Oh my sheesh, you're right. Damn that fat homo of a king. Well, I got to go to bed now," Kirby said.

In the morning, Kirby got home at 7:25 a.m.

"Good morning, Ribbon," Kirby greeted.

"Hello, Kirby...oh no, oh no!!! Where's the candycane?!? Help me look for the candycane!!!" Ribbon panicked.

"This may be just a guess, but is it on the shelf you placed it last night?" Kirby pointed.

"How embarassing. I thought it went missing. OH NO!! ROBBER THROUGH THE WINDOW!!!" Ribbon screamed and hid herself and the candycane under the bed.

"Hey Kirby. Do you want to go to the arcade? They're selling chocolate maximum tomatoes for free!" Karby asked through the window.

"In a minute; I'll be there! (Turns to Ribbon.) Ribbon, you've got to stop worrying and continue living your life," Kirby said.

"You're right, Kirby. It's jst a wishing candycane after all. Thanks Kirby. Go ahead," Ribbon told Kirby. Then Kirby and Karby raced down to the arcade.

_5 hours later, Kirby arrives back to his home._

"Hey, Ribbon. Where are you going?" Kirby asked.

"Well, me and Bow are going to Rock Star's famous diner. But I can't bring the candycane with me, so I guess you go to take care of it while I'm gone," Ribbon told.

"Goodie. I can spend 2 hours looking at a magical Cristmas treat!" Kirby complained.

"Promise me that you won't eat it?" Ribbon asked.

"I won't eat it. It taste like s--- anyway. Pardon the language," Kirby said.

"Okay then, see ya later," Ribbon said and then flew off.

_Almost 2 hours later of staring at the candycane_.

"Hey Kirby! Kirby!" A voice yelled out.

"Oh sheesh, that annoying voice...hi Tiff...where's Tuff?" Kirby asked.

"Oh, he have to pay the debt for Meta Knight...say, what's that?" Tiff asked pointing to the candycane.

"It's none of your buisness. Why are you here anyway? I didn't invite you in my house?" Kirby asked.

"Of course you did. Tokkori said so," Tiff explained.

"SERVES YOU RIGHT FOR MAKING GOOEY MAKE OUT WITH ME! HE GAVE ME H.I.V'S" Tokkori yelled.

"Ugh. Fine, I'll tell you. It's a candycane genie. It grants wishes when you lick on it," Kirby explained.

"Sounds amazing! May I have a lick?" Tiff asked.

"NO!" Kirby simplied answered.

"Why not? I won't make any bad wishes. Please?" Tiff whined.

"Fine. Just make your wish and then get the fruit out of here!!!" Kirby yelled.

But before Tiff could take a lick out of it, there was a demanding voice in the background.

"Hey asshead, drop that candy cane!!" It was Ribbon who yelled that.

After Tiff dropped the candycane, Ribbon flew straight to Kirby.

"KIRBY!!! How could you give this slut that candycane? Are you...are you cheating on me???" Ribbon asked.

"No; I had to give her the candycane to leave my sight!" Kirby said.

"That's the samething had in my mind at this moment, because I can't even trust you anymore!" Ribbon yelled.

"You know what, if you feel that way, them maybe you should get the hell out of my house then. And why not take my precious candycane with you, then!!" Kirby yelled.

"I was about to do that, anyway, so you may spend as much time with your pansy, Tiff!" Ribbon yelled.

"Okay; THAT IS WHERE YOU DRAW THE LINE!!! BRING IT ON, BITCH!!!" Kirby yelled.

After that, Ribbon and Kirby are fighting like Mario and Sonic at Super Smash Bros. Brawl.

"Woah! I did not expect that to happen," Tokkori said quietly.

* * *

A/N: Well, now you see why Ribbon and Kirby's relationship is messed up. What will happen next? Be on the look out for chapter 2 and find out. 


	2. Adelenine the Marrage Counciler

_Ribbon_ and **Kirby's** Relationship..._**Messed up**_

Last time, you've witness with your very own eye of Ribbon and Kirby's relationship torn apart because of...a magical candy cane. So now they're in a marriage council to fix all of this bull crap.

Much oblige to David for reviewing this story.

Disclaimer: I don't own Kirby.

Chapter 2: Adelenine the Marrage Counciler

* * *

A day later, someone had finally had the guts to stop Ribbon and Kirby's crazy fight! It was none other than Adelenine!

"Hey!! Guys!! Stop with the fighting! Now I see you have a tiny problem with your marrage. And why is that?" Adelenine asked.

"Why would you want to know? You're just an awful artist!" Kirby yelled.

"Whoa!! Why would you talk to our friend like you have no sense!?" Ribbon asked.

"HEY!! ENOUGH WITH THE ARGUMENTS ALREADY!!" Adelenine yelled.

They've then stared at the panting Adelenine.

"She started it..." Kirby said.

"Hush...I'm sorry about yelling, but stupid arguments really piss me off. Now Kirby asked me why would I care about this," Adelenine said.

"And he called you an awful artist as well!" Ribbon pointed out.

"So it's illegal to tell the truth now?" Kirby asked.

Adelenine, really pissed now, just took out a blow horn and blew it to shut Ribbon and Kirby up.

"If you guys yelp out of turn once more, I'll paint a portal and send you to the freaken _Family Guy_dimension!!" Adelenine threatened.

Ribbon and Kirby just gulped.

"As I was saying, the reason I'm concerned is that I'm not only an artist, but I'm also a marrage counciler...in training," she finished.

"Permission to speak?" Kirby asked. Adelenine nodded.

"Just how good are you with counciling anyway?" Kirby asked.

"Well, I've just started a week ago, but I do know the basics...which is, I hope, good enough," Adelenine answered.

"May I speak?" Ribbon asked.

"You guys don't have to ask to speak, but you can't argue with each other every second! Yes, you may speak, Ribbon," Adelenine said.

"You'll find a perfect way to bring us back together, right?" Ribbon asked.

"Duh! Why would she come to us besides that? To lick the Magical Candy cane?" Kirby asked.

"If you mention that candy cane one more time..." Ribbon started.

"Okay...that's it!!" Adelenine yelled as she wields her paintbrush at Ribbon and Kirby.

(Moments later)

"Where are we...uh oh!" Kirby said as he saw Peter by his feet.

"(Laughs) You're fat and stupid. And from the pink, you're gay as well. I've got to show you to the Clam," Peter said carrying Kirby away.

"Well, that takes care of that son of a..." Ribbon started until she saw Brian and Stewie coming.

"Come on, Brian, where's Rupert?" Stewie asked.

"There he is. I remodel him to look like a fairy," Brian lied.

"Imbecile!! Rupert looks like a fag!! Although you did a good job on him...no!! I must re-remodel him to his old self again," Stewie said taking Ribbon to his room.

"It's a good thing he's never brave to look in the basement without company," Brian said to himself.

(A day later.)

Ribbon and Kirby walked into Adelenine's office.

"Did you learn from yesterday?" she asked as she saw Ribbon covered in bear stuffing and a very embarrassed red/purple Kirby. They barely nodded.

"Good, let's begin with the most important subject in this...reason. Why were you guys fighting? You first, Ribbon," Adelenine asked.

"Well, I saw Kirby giving the Magical Candy cane to Tiff. That's when I realise that she's cheating on me with a skunkbag!!" Ribbon yelled.

"You guys were fighting over a candycane!?" Adelenine asked and then laughed.

"Umm, can it be my turn yet?" Kirby asked. Adelenine nodded, stopped laughing.

"The only reason I gave that skunkbag the Magical Candy cane is because I only wanted her to leave me alone!" Kirby answered.

"Oh really? Isn't there any other reason for you bringing her the candycane?" Ribbon asked angrily.

"WOMAN, WILL YOU STOP ASKING ME THESE STUPID QUESTIONS!?" Kirby yelled.

Again, Adelenine wields her paintbrush and sends them to the Family Guy dimention.

"This is gonna be a long month," She said to herself.

* * *

Sorry about the short chapter, but I barely have any ideas for this story. Next chapter will be better, because it's not the last. Be on the look out for it.


	3. The Lie Detector

Ribbon _and _**Kirby's _Relationship..._**Messed up

A/N: I have nothing to say but this message.

* * *

Chapter 3: The Lie Detector.

"So, how was your second trip? Horrible, right?" Adelenine asked.

Ribbon and Kirby were shivering with fear.

"W-w-w-we'll be good," they both said.

"If only you were telling the truth, I'd believe ya. Just prove me wrong, and your counsling will be free?" Adelenine promised.

"I thought this was always free," Ribbon said.

"Dealing with you guys owes me something," she sighed.

"Not to be impatient, but may we get this over with?" Kirby asked.

"Well first you have to meet my work-in-progress customers," Adelenine said painting a door on a wall.

Inside were Rick and Pick, Lolo and Lala, Tokkori and Gooey, King Dedede and his mom, and Bow and Karby.

"Hey guys. What are you doing here?" Bow asked.

"Yeah. You two are like the greatest couple since Britney and Brad!" Karby asked.

"As flattering as that sounds, we're here because Kirby gave that skunkbag Tiff the magic candycane!" Ribbon cried.

"For the umpty times infinity time! I gave it to her to get her out of my sight!!" Kirby yelled.

"Sure you have...not to get in your buisness, but why are you guys here?" Ribbon asked.

"We were so bored. So we talked to each other, and we decide to come here. Plus, I think it'll be entertaining see Dedede and his mom here," Bow chuckled.

"You shut the hell up and respect me!!" Dedede yelled.

"Watch you mouth, mutha fewer!!" his mom commanded.

"I am a son of a hypocrate," he sighed.

"Alrighty, everyone. Please welcome our new couple on a strand...Kirby and Ribbon," Adelenine introduced.

The cheering sounded like it came from an audience in an arena.

"Let's introduce them to the basics...starting with the lie detector test. A high pitch beep is true, a deep pitch beep is false. We'll start with Lolo and Lala," Adelenine said.

"Okay, Lolo. Did you ignore me when I was last kidnap, ONLY for some 'you' time?" Lala asked.

"No way! You seen those obstacles before you were locked up?!" Lolo asked.

The machine made a high pitch beep.

"Whew! What a relief that was," Lala said.

"That's great. Next up is Rick and Pick," Adelenine said.

"Okay. Rick. When you became a hooker to repay our debts, did you really enjoy having sex with another woman?" Pick asked. The others chuckled at the question.

"Sheesh. You had to ask personal question didn't you...ummm, no," Rick answered to the machine and it made a low pitch beep.

"You...how could you?!" Pick asked.

"Fine I did. But only one. To explain, her name was Nickie. I met her long before you, and we almost married until she had to leave to her job. Then during my debt repayment spree, I met her and her high buisness here, so why not? It was better than when we first did it...especally when Nick lick my di..." Rick thought.

"HEY!! This is a K plus story! Let's just get to the next couple!" Adelenine warned.

"Tokkori? Have you switched all of my diet soda with bear?" Gooey asked.

"WHAT?! ARE YOU ACCUSING ME OF SOMETHING?!! YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOUR...yes," Tokkori answered and the machine made a high pitch beep.

"T-Tokkori? How could you?!" Gooey cried.

"FIRST OF ALL, WE ONLY MET YESTERDAY. SECOND OF ALL, YOU DRUNK RAPING ME WASN'T CLEAR THAT YOUR NOT A DRUMK AT ALL!!" Tokkori ranted.

"This is taking too long. NEXT!!" Adelenine cried out.

"Do you think I'm a good mother?" DDD's mother asked.

"Hell...to the no!! I rather have Escargoon as my mother!!" DDD yelled and the machine made a high pitched beep.

"I fed you. I gave you a roof over your head, and this was the thanks I get?!" DDD's mother asked.

"A potato chip a week and a 10 ton roof on my head isn't so satisfying," DDD answered.

"Before this get out of hand, we'll send in the final couple," Adelenine said.

"Kirby, did you give that candycane to Tiff out of love?" Ribbon asked.

"Woot!! Nice choice of words, girlfriend!!" Karby randomly yelled.

"No, I didn't. You've got to believe me on this!" Kirby sighed.

Then there was a game show like suspense (think of 'The Moment of Truth.')

The machine made a high pitched beep.

"Yeah! Kirby told the truth!!" Lolo yelled and everyone cheered.

"Oh Kirby!! I'm very sorry that I doubted you!!" Ribbon cried and kissed Kirby.

"Congradulations for the people who had recieved the answers they want, and shame on those who had a dissapointing answer," Adelenine said.

The guys looked worried as the girls glanced at them with anger.

"At least...that's what I could say, but what I would say is that girls, it's not just a Kirby parody of 'Tool Academy," Adelenine smirked.

"What's going on here?" Gooey asked.

"Since the guys had to suffer through this, you have to do it too. So boys, think of the juciest questions," Adelenine announced.

Now the girls looked worried as the guy's made an evil smirk.

"Whoever was first the last time is first again," Adelenine reported.

"Lala, have you ever cheated on me when either you and me were kidnapped by our enemy to our enemy?" Lolo asked.

"(Sigh). Yes I did," Lala said and the machine made a high pitched beep.

"So you were looking for some 'you' time?" Lolo asked.

"I'm so sorry, but it was a moment of weakness!!" Lala cried.

"Ouch. I knew this would pay off. NEXT!!" Adelenine yelled.

"Pick, were you planning to use your platinum card I gave you for Christmas?" Rick asked.

"Of course I planned to. I would've told you in the first place," Pick said, but the machine made a low pitched beep.

"Woah, woah woah!! You were getting made at me for a credit card that YOU WEREN'T GONNA LOSE?!" Rick yelled.

"Feh! Credit cards are for losers anyway," Pick responded.

"SO WHY DIDN'T YOU FRIGGEN SAY YOU DIDN'T WANT IT?! You know what, you can keep it, Kirby," Rick told.

"You know what, Ade, this is a good idea," Kirby smiled.

"Yay! My first compliment in a long time! Who's up next?" Adelenine asked.

"Gooey, are you a drunk like you say you weren't?" Tokkori asked.

"I am not a drunk!!" Gooey yelled. But again, the machine made a low pitch beep.

"HONEY, I LOVE YA," Tokkori cheered.

"You're not made at me for being a drunk?" Gooey asked.

"I'M A LITTLE PEEVED FOR YOU LYING TO ME, BUT I'M NEVER MAD!!" Tokkori said and the machine made a very low pitched beep. "AWWW, WHO ASKED YA?" he asked the machine.

"This is lasting too long again," Adelenine said.

"Mother...are you my real mother?" DDD asked.

"Of course I am. I wouldn't take of ya if I wasn't," his mother replied and the machine made a low pitched beep.

DDD looked very shocked.

"Okay I'm not your mother. I just need something to take care of during my spare time," the 'mother' replied.

"I...I...I don't believe it! You're not my mother...this is the HAPPIEST DAY OF MY LIFE!!!! With your attemp of taking care of me, the only thing I could say is F(bleep!) YOU!!" DDD yelled as he ran out of the therapy room celebrating.

"Yeah, this story will turn into T now...next," Adelenine sighed.

"Do he kiss his mother with that mouth?" DDD's 'mom' asked and leave the building as well.

Kirby though for a long moment.

"Hey Ribbon...did you really get this candycane from the mayor?" Kirby asked.

"Uhh...yes. I told you I did. Would I be lying to you?" Ribbon asked.

But the machine made a low pitched beep sound and the whole room gasped.

"Kirby! How did you know that was a fake candycane?" Adelenine asked

"This is a real magical candycane. But honestly, I knew that this wasn't from the mayor since he was too busy raising tax for his personal use. Okay Ribbon; fess up, and don't spare the details," Kirby commanded in a unusual disappointed voice.

"Fine, if you must know. This candy cane was actually from Metaknight and it wasn't to protect it, it was actually a gift of kindness...he wouldn't say love though. I hope your not mad about this," Ribbon said nervously.

"I'm not too mad that you cheated on me...even from Metaknight. What I am pissed about is that you were mad thinking that I cheated on you WHEN YOU CHEATED ON ME!!!" Kirby yelled.

"Hey! Don't be yelling at her!! She thought you cheated on her with her sister one time!" Pick yelled.

"So what you're saying is that a woman has the right to cheat on a man, but not the other way around?" Lolo asked.

"It's your fault for you taking long to save me," Lala cried.

"AND IF THE WOMAN GETS COUGHT IT'S THE MAN'S FAULT?!?!" Tokkori argued.

"You know what, yes it is!!" Karby replied.

"Hey Einstein, you're on their side!!" Gooey yelled.

"Oh yeah. Well this is why I'm not in a relationship!" Karby yelled.

"Time out!! What about me?!" Bow asked.

Moments later, everyone in the room was in a big argument that turned into physical fighting.

"(Sigh). I think I made some good progress here. Stay tuned for next chapter as I calm these idiots down," Adelenine said, waving her paintbrush at the crowd.


	4. Three Parts of Random

Ribbon & Kirby's Relationship...Messed Up!!

(Warning: This story has passed the random level in this chapter. Read at your own risk and enjoyment)

(Plus, character's thoughts can change in an instant.)

Chapter 4 Part 1: Unforgivable Treason and Hypocrisy

* * *

(Camera shows Adelenine on a comfy couch, sipping coffee)

"Hello there, human beings and abused pets of the fourth wall. Sorry for the huge delay, but the author has received a disease worse than Swine Flu and Cancer combined...it's procrastination and writers block. Anyway, I'm here to yap about what happened before today to refresh your memory.

Wife, Ribbon has received a magical candy cane, and has asked husband, Kirby to keep the candy cane safe and unlicked from anyone. Unfortunately, she caught him giving the candy cane to Tiff when he really wanted her to leave him alone. After that and a bunch of fighting from the two, I, yours truly, came and offered to help the two settle their differences, so Whispy Woods could sleep in peace. After getting their cooperation, I showed them my counseling room, which includes their so called 'friends'. First I did was giving them the lie detector test, which revealed Kirby telling the truth, but Ribbon telling a big fat lie, for the candy cane wasn't from the Mayor McCheese, but from Meta Knight. Kirby was pissed at Ribbon for not going out with friggen Meta Knight, but for her hypocrisy, which caused a big argument. Suddenly, Snagglepuss and the Pink Panther fought a tag team wrestling match with the undefeated Heathcliff and Garfield and...wait, that's not in this fic. Can Ribbon redeem her trust to Kirby? Will she be his ex-wife? Will DDD find his real mother? Will there ever be spaces between statements anymore?! All this, and more coming up right now... (Hears watch beep)...well, I guess it's time to let them in," she completed as she waved her paintbrush to make a portal.

(Moments later after the portal)

"Had fun in there, guys?" Adelenine cockily asked as she saw scarred, pale faces from everyone.

"T-t-that show i-is j-ust awful at the l-later seasons," Gooey said, mortified.

"W-what's w-w-worse is that S-seth made another s-spin-off!" Tokkori eerily whispered.

"Y-y-you left us in there for nine months!," Bow cried.

"Great. Now the next time a fight erupt, you'll go there instead of Family Guy," Adelenine warned.

"So what are we doing now?" Ribbon asked.

"...Oh sweet mother of Sherlock! I was busy watching you suffer that I forgot to plan on the next subject. I'll be back for an idea. In the meantime, you could talk to each other," she advised as she left.

At first, talking to each other after hearing the truth was waaaaay too awkward. Suddenly, Bow started to speak.

"Soooo...is there anything to eat here?" she asked.

"Nothing. What kind of place doesn't have any refreshments? Mints at least," Karby complained.

"WHAT KIND OF RETARD ADELENINE IS, NOT LEAVING US CANDY?!!!!!!!" Tokkori yelled.

"I really don't want to hear that word," Kirby sighed.

"We know your relationship is on the rocks like most of us (glances at Lala)... well, yours is more like a grain of sand, but we are starving!" Lolo said.

"Yeah, whatever. I'm going outside," Kirby announced as he leaves.

"Never see Kirby so low before. Ribbon, you have to talk to him," Rick advised.

"What's the point?! He hates my guts! He never talked to me once in the Family Guy relic! What would you think he listen to me now!!" Ribbon cried.

"FIRST OF ALL, HE'S MAYBE TOO SICK FROM HEARING THOSE DAMN POLITICAL, RACIST, AND TIRESOME CELEBRITY JOKES TO THINK ABOUT TALKING AT ALL, LIKE EVERYONE ELSE!!" Tokkori answered.

"Besides, you're the only person that Kirby has ever loved. There's still a little trust for you if you talk to him now," Lala said.

"Yeah, you're right. If I want to keep my husband, I better get going," Ribbon said as she started to leave.

"What the hell was that?! Why are you giving relationship advice if you can't fix our own?!" Lolo yelled.

"Don't start with me," she glanced.

(Meanwhile, outside the painted door)

"Kirby? Where are you? Kirby?" Ribbon yelled as she was looking for him.

Moments later, she found Kirby, but she saw him starting to smoking the candy cane as a cigarette.

"KIRBY!! Are you smoking with the magic candy cane?!" Ribbon shrieked.

"Turns out you've been fooled too, for Meta Knight gave you only a regular candy cane. I licked it, and there was zero magic. I'm only burning harsh memories," Kirby replied.

"Snap out of it, man! If we're gonna settle this, we need to talk!" Ribbon cried, shaking Kirby to sanity.

"Keep your filthy hands off me, you cheating tramp!" Kirby cried, pushing her away.

"WILL YOU LISTEN TO ME?! META KNIGHT GAVE ME THE CANDY CANE, BUT I WASN'T CHEATING ON YOU!!!" Ribbon cried, then flew to a nearby bush.

Kirby hesitantly, but officially ran after her.

"Maybe I was too harsh on you and should've let you explain before the fight broke," Kirby said. "Still, there was ZERO excuse for you accusing me of cheating on you for a poor excuse for a living thing like Tiff."

"Yeah. It's pretty much my fault that this whole thing is going on.I've should've known how much you hated that bossy girl. I was just worried that I'd lose you. Now let's back before Ade catches us," Ribbon advised as they headed for the painted door.

* * *

Intermission: Tokkori's Punishment.

(Camera returns to Adelenine on her couch.)

"Hello again. I hope you've enjoyed the sappy, yet dramatic half of this chapter, which was planned by yours truly. I needed to get these guys together for the next task anyway. However, I overheard the yellow bastard calling me a 'retard' for not leaving anything to eat. So I've decided to give him a punishment far worse than whatever Seth McFarlene can ever create," she said before painting a portal.

Inside the portal was a room so dark that nothing could be seen.

"WILL IT KILL SOMEONE TO TURN ON THE FRIGGEN LIGHTS?!!" Tokkori yelled.

Suddenly, the lights dimmly turned on and Tokkori sees that he's inside a familiar chamber.

"WHAT THE HELL IS THIS? WHERE IS EVERYONE?! AND WHY DOES THIS SCENE LOOK SO FAMILIAR?!" he continued.

Then he noticed a static T.V. on a wall, a chain on his leg, and gas sprayers.

"Oh God...I know why it's so familiar," he thought nervously.

Suddenly, on the T.V. appeared a short man with a red and white mask.

"Hello there, little friend. Would you like to play a game?" he asked.

"PLEASE DON'T SPRAY ME WITH POISONOUS GAS AND MAKE ME LOOK FOR A KEY IN 60 SECONDS TO A VACCINE!!!" Tokkori cried.

"...You really do take the fun out of everything. Well, you've got half right. You will look for a key for the vaccine, but it will be something worse than poisonous gas," the masked guy continued.

"W-what do you mean by that?" Tokkori asked.

"Those canisters you've seen aren't filled with poisonous gas...they are filled with the sweat of Alfred Khan!" he said.

Tokkori then gasped and said, "No...please don't say what think this means."

"That's right. As soon as the spray lands, you'll feel the affects of 4Kids on you. That means NO BEER!!" the masked guy yelled before making an evil laugh.

"I RATHER SUFFER THE FATE OF THE POISONOUS GAS!!" Tokkori cried. Then he noticed the masked guy was talking to someone from the sideline. "HEY! WHAT'S GOING ON IN THERE?!"

"Apparently, someone (glances at the sideline) turned the sprays on while you were asleep, so that means you have no time to look for the key. Way to ruin the fun, Steve!" he yelled to the side in a scratchy tone.

"You told me to turn it on while he was asleep," Steve replied.

"D-d-dr. Weird? Is that you?!" Tokkori asked.

"Great! He knows! Well anyway, I hope you have fun with your life, Dan Green!" Dr. Weird yelled before he laughed evily.

"NOOOO!" cried Tokkori, transitioning from the Saw chamber to the marrage counsil room.

"Rise and shine, early bird," Gooey mocked.

"Was the screaming really necessary?!" Pick asked.

"I think that's how he usually wakes up," Kirby inserted.

"THAT IS NOT TRUE! I'VE HAD A NIGHTMARE TOO WEIRD TO EXPLAIN CLEARLY!!" Tokkori cried.

(One clear dream explaimation later)

"You were at the Saw chamber?!" Gooey cried.

"It's where he belongs after treating me like crap," Kirby noted.

"But the 4-Kids stuff was too dark. I'm glad you really don't sound like Dan Green," Lala noted.

"You four were in 4-Kids already. What was it like?" Ribbon asked Kirby, Tokkori, Lolo and Lala.

"If you think the censors in this fic was bad, you would die watching this," Kirby explained.

"OUR CHARACTERS WERE ANNOYING AS HEEEELL!! AND I'M NO EXCUSE!!" Tokkori cried.

"Make the bad memories go away," Lolo and Lala said in a fetal position.

"Let's talk about something else now," Bow thought.

As they were talking, Adelenine was behind a doorway with a pad and paper.

"Saw Chamber...4-Kids...Dr. Weird...all perfect for my revenge for the little yellow bastard for calling me a retard," she said to herself as she wrote her ideas.

(And now, back to what was meant to be this fanfic.)

* * *

Chapter 4 Part 2 (or 3): The Obstacle's Confessions.

After things returned to normal-ish, Adelenine returned to the room.

"Ladies, gentlemen, and whatever Tokkori is," she started.

"SHUT THE HELL UP, YOU PSYCHOPATH!!" Tokkori yelled, which Adelenine ignored.

"There has been some relationship problems and maybe make-ups during this session. Well, since I couldn't think of anything counsil relating, I've decided to bring in the rocks of the relationship," Adelenine announced.

"Isn't this counsil related?" Pick asked, which Adelenine ignored again.

"So everyone, here are your obstacles!" she greeted as she opened a portal.

The ones who entered are 'The Great Devil', Kine holding a beer keg, a credit card, and Meta Knight.

"Alright everyone who entered; introduce yourselves," she demanded.

"I AM THE GREAT DEVIL: THE ENEMY OF LOLO AND LALA!! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!," the Devil laughed menacingly.

"Hey, Keith," Lala greeted.

"KEITH?!" everyone asked in shock.

"(Sigh) Yes, that's my real name," he admitted in a human tone.

"...Keith?! Are you friggen serious?! My enemy's name is KEITH?! What a loser!!" Lolo cried, laughing.

"Just because my name is Keith, doesn't mean that I won't kill you," he cried.

"Moving on...," Adelenine said impatiently.

"My name is Kine, and I'm holding the obstacle of Tokkori and Gooey...a beer keg," Kine sighed in disbelief.

"But we realise that beer is keeping us together!" Gooey noted.

"Well, you see..." Kine started.

"Wait a minute! How can you breath without water?!" Kirby interrupted.

"(Sigh)...I'm the second coming of Jesus Christ. Does that make sense at all?!" he angrily asked.

"Yeah that makes sense...I also see you brought Pick's credit card too," he noted.

"Umm no. Wasn't it right there before I entered?" Kine asked.

"Foolish knaves. I am the Platinum Card of Untold Riches, separating these two rodents from their love while I could be fixing planet Earth's economy," the credit card spoke.

"So you're the second coming of Christ?" Karby asked.

"Uh-uh. Kine's Jesus Christ," Kirby answered.

"I'm not Jesus for Christ's sake!!" Kine replied.

"But you said you were," Kirby whined.

"That's called 'SARCASM!!'" Kine explained.

"Really?! What does that taste like?" Kirby stupidly asked.

"DAMMIT, KIRBY!!!" Kine frustratedly cried.

"Can we not make a DBZ Abridged reference and go on?! Adelenine asked.

"Yoink! The credit card's mine! Time for a shopping spree!" Bow cheerfully said.

"Bow! Will you please stop acting like an idiot and sit down?!" Ribbon demanded in embarrassment.

"Since you want dash my dreams, I'm gonna let Meta-Spam speak now," Bow pouted.

"...I'm going to ignore that comment...but Brawl did give me a better voice than 4-Kids," Meta Knight explained.

"WILL YOU GET ON WITH IT?!?!" both Bow and Adelenine yelled.

"Fine. I am Meta Knight, master of swordsmanship and fan girl glomper. Now where are the free toys you promised?" Meta Knight asked with concern.

"Yeah! I wouldn't have came and I will leave if I don't have my toy!" Keith whined.

"You've got to be...(sigh) I've never seen a bunch of grown men cry over toys," Adelenine complained in disbelief and gave those who entered a beanie baby.

"Yay! Now my life is complete," Keith cheered.

"Hell-ooooo! Aren't you forgetting the woman you've constantly kidnapped?" Lala asked in disbelief.

"Are you seriously preferring a sissy devil name Keith?!" Lolo cried.

"Great! Now since we're back in topic, we shall put this lie detector on you and the one being 'scrubbed,' which is Lolo, will ask you an important question.

"Okay...Great Devil Keith, why do you kidnap Lala?" Lolo asked.

"Okay...me and my two buddies name Seth and Al decided to play a game and it's whoever can piss off people wins. It turns out the winner was another guy name Osama, but he wasn't even the contest! He was so good that we had to declare him the winner," Keith blabbed.

"Get on with it, man!" everyone yelled.

"Anyway, my idea was to piss someone off was to kidnap every dude's girlfriend...starting with Lolo's. It turns out that all she want do is talk to me and say very weird things like 'I like your butt. It's huge enough for two.' It was very distracting! So I gave Lolo the map to get her back," Keith explained.

"Why didn't your dumbass just kick her out, or even give her back to Lolo?" Karby asked.

"...Huh. Never though of that," he answered.

"Wait! All those times you've kidnap me...it was just a stupid game?! It wasn't for love at all?!" Lala asked in disappointment.

"Hell no! It was only twice that I've kidnap you and my son the third time...and it was only a game," he honestly answered.

"You know what...I'm done with all of this bogus stuff. Have a nice life alone, Lala," Lolo said as he left through the portal out.

"I...I...I just lost someone I lust over and someone who loved me. My life is destroyed," Lala cried. As she left, her color turned from pink to gray.

Everyone in the room was silent.

"...Cool special effects." Keith said in awe.

"Wha...? Get the hell out of here!" Adelenine ordered. "(Sigh). Kine your next."

"HEY STUPID CHRISTIAN FISH! WHY ARE YOU HERE WITH A BEER KEG?!?!" Tokkori asked.

"That's a very good question," Kine started, sounding like a teacher. "You see, Gooey excessively drinks, as you may notice. But if you clearly noticed when you made out with Gooey, 'she' had no reproduction system. That is because 'she' drank so much during that one dare that 'her' reproduction system shrank to non-existing, which throughout time, which led 'her' to believe that you're 'her' boyfriend and more importantly, believe that 'she' is a girl. If you couldn't figure out by now, Gooey is not a 'she', but a 'he,' which you mindlessly had sex with. How did I know you may think? Let's say I've drove that same road Tokkori went through. Now if you excuse me, I'm going to get rid of this day from my head," Kine explained and leaped to the other side of the portal.

Everyone was silent again.

"I did say Gooey's gender in Chapter 1, didn't I?" Kirby started.

"You know, maybe I am a boy. But you know what? Our love doesn't compare to what gender, race, or religion I am. As long as I'm with you, I could be anything my man wants, right Tokkori? Tokkori? Are you okay?!" Gooey asked.

"I-I-I-I-I-I-I m-made out with a d-dude...I made out with a gender confused d-dude. If you need me, I'll be suicidal with Lala," Tokkori said in a disturbed and eerie tone while flying away to the portal.

"Wait! Tokkori! I still love you!" Gooey cried.

"...Wow. Who knew this story could get funny to sad to disturbing? Next up is...the credit card," Adelenine sighed in disbelief.

"I have no need for the metal detector, nor a question, for I'm here to explain this needless drama," the credit card started as Bow endlessly stared at it.

"Oh, just shut up and explain already!" Pick demanded.

"Yeah! The sooner you finish yapping, the quicker I'll spend you," Bow added while drooling.

"(Sigh) Foolish knaves. I made this couple of Rick and Pick a happier couple than Chris and Rihanna. They spend me responsibly and they loved me as well as each other. But then...HE came!" The credit card yelled, signaling itself at Kirby.

"Woah! What did I do?!" Kirby asked.

"Don't you remember, wastful idiot, two years ago?! While you tried to impress your...soon-to-be-ex-girlfriend, you bought the stupidest of materials from me, and Rick took the pain from not only the material, but his girl's relationship as well. What do you have to say for yourself?!" the credit card asked.

"What do I say? My best friend helped me get my relationship with Ribbon, and killed his relationship in return! What do I fracken say?! Well, I say...I like pie," Kirby innocently said.

Everyone groaned in response.

"Rick! I am soooo sorry! This whole time, I thought it was you who bought wastefully and made unnecessary long distance calls!" Pick cried with tears of joy.

"Umm...yeah! Kirby did increase our phone bill," Rick said innocently.

"Come on, Rick. Let's go home and start over," Pick suggested.

"Not so fast, guys. Couples leaving happily have to pay," Adelenine noted.

"It's well worth it. Could you put it on this credit card?" Rick asked.

"Sure thing. Your bill will come soon," Adelenine noted after exchanging credit cards.

"I don't remember increasing Rick's phone bill, nor using his phone," Kirby said to himself as the couple left.

"Laaaaame! I wanted the relationship to end hilariously!" Karby whined.

"I've should've taken the credit card when I had the chance," Bow complained.

"...Why the hell are you two here?!" Adelenine asked.

"Your right. With only these two here, it'll be quite boring. Anyway, good luck with your relationship, sis," Bow said.

_"Oh boy do I need it if Meta Knight tells the truth," _Ribbon thought.

"You too, bro," Karby said leaving.

"Well technally, we're not brothers; we're not even related. You're just a copy of myself with red skin from Meta Knight sliced and..." Kirby blabbed.

"NERD!!!" Kine yelled from the other side of the portal.

"Wait...what?" Kirby cluelessly asked.

"Alright. Let's drop the DBZ Abridged acting already and let's now get to the juiciest part of this counselling. Meta Knight, put on this lie detector helmet on, and Kirby, ask him the most important questions between yours and Ribbon's relationship," Adelenine instructed.

In that moment, Kirby turned from a retarded goofball to a serious sphere when he was thinking up a question.

"How well do you know Ribbon?" Kirby asked.

"Well, from my instincts and constant stalking between you two, she probably told you that the only time she met me was when I gave her the one wish candy cane out of pity, right?" Meta Knight asked.

"...I'm still on the 'constant stalking' part," Kirby said.

"Well, she was WRONG! She only wrote letters to you while she was going out with me only a year and a half after you saved the universe from Dark Matter. From September 11, 2001 to August 11, 2007."

"W-w-wha?! You were seeing each other for nearly 6 years!? Ribbon! Why the hell were you still replying with the e-mails?!" Kirby bursted.

"I didn't want to tell you! I liked you even when I was going out with him!" Ribbon cried.

"You know, I feel like I'm only used as a resource to your love life! What happened on August 11th?" Kirby asked.

"I broke up with her because she said she'd rather go with you. Besides, I found Tiff better," Meta Knight noted. (Satisfied, MetaXTiff fan base?)

"So she did huh? Too bad it took 6 friggen years for her to tell you. Now what is up with the candy cane? Why did you give it to her even though you knew we were...and probably still are, having a relationship?" Kirby asked, which bought up Ribbon's nearly destroyed spirit.

"I wanted to try again without Tiff noticing us...but then Ribbon told me the announcement I dare not say," Meta Knight sighed as he disappeared.

"(Sigh). I'm so sorry for all of this to happen. You were always the one I liked the most. I didn't want to lose you, even through letters, but Meta Knight was nice guy, so I had to date, but I never had you out of my mind. (Sniff). I don't blame you if leave me; but I at least I get to live guiltless now," Ribbon cried quietly.

"Well, I could, but I won't live guiltless. You're just someone that I can't hate for too long. Sometimes I hate what comes out of your mouth, but the paragraph above this one is what I like about you. That and you're pretty helpful when it comes to adventures," Kirby explained.

"So does this mean that we're not break up, and being closer to each other?" Ribbon asked with hopes.

"Well...just two more things," Kirby said before placing the lie detector helmet on her. "One thing's for sure, promise me that you wouldn't go behind my back again, as I wouldn't yours," Kirby said.

"I promise. No one's better than you, Kirby," Ribbon said.

"And the second thing...what did you tell Meta Knight that quickly changed his mind?" Kirby asked.

"Aww. I wanted to be a surprise until it gets obvious. I told him that I'm pregnant and you're the father...cause I am," Ribbon blushed.

"(Whew)! What a relief. I though you would say...UUWHAAT?!?!" Kirby asked in complete shock.

"That's right! We're gonna be parents!" Ribbon cheered.

"Wow! That's fantastic!" Kirby cheered along.

* * *

A/N: I smell a third Kirby story from me. If anyone read this all the way through, I thank you for dealing with the high intensity of this random fanfic. There are a few notes I want to get out of the way.

1. I use to like Family Guy. But the newer seasons is just awful. And unfortunately, I keep watching it, hoping to expect something funny, while all I receive is not funny at all (maybe a few chuckles here and there). Although I list the reasons in here already, the main reason is that they have these scenes where a character does something and it takes forever to finish it, and it has nothing to do with the plot (ex. Peter's Roadhouse driving).

Now before I'm called a hypocrite, I would say that I do use Family Guy jokes, even from recent seasons, but only those that I see are funny.

2. The Tokkori in the Saw chamber bit was suppose to be a promo for Saw 6 (though I don't know the main aspect, I though of some guy in a mask torturing the heck out of people). Unfortunately, due to procrastination of part 3, that wasn't done on time.

3. I may add a bonus chapter of this soon like my first RibbonXKirby fic, but I need ideas that has to do with in between this and the upcoming threequal. So it's a definite maybe.

4. If you haven't seen either Yu-Gi-Oh or Dragon Ball Z, the Abriged Series, you must see them.

With those out of the way, for any fans of the fics, expect the final story of the trilogy, **_Ribbon and Kirby's Relationship...With Kids, _**on the fanfiction page sometime in May/June 2010.

And don't worry, Lala and Tokkori will be alright by then.


End file.
